Back in September we ran a series of trans-inclusive workshops specifically for our female and non binary Members. Participants were asked to produce pieces of creative writing during the workshops which we are sharing, with permission, to celebrate International Women’s Day. This is the final installment of the writing, more will be published throughout the week.
The second stage of this workshop series is starting again next week. Places are fully subscribed but you can find out more about them in the What’s On section.
Stepping into Freedom by Carol L
Stepping into freedom, a new way of being
I began to see the sticky web I’d been caught in
Trapped for years without even knowing
It started out small. Little things that I ignored;
his agitation when I didn’t hold his hand
the way he lost his temper at miniscule fragments.
I tried to walk more gently, until I hardly walked at all
Little by little he spun his web around me
He didn’t like my music, my cooking or my clothes
I gave up parts of me to try to make him happy
Then I gave up almost all of me to try to keep him quiet
And all the time the web around me grew
I ended up drinking to stop all the feeling
But it stripped away more of me and
increased his hold on me
The web was complete
Stepping into freedom, a new way of being
A ten-day stay at a detox.
The counsellor asked me about my partner
I told her how he’d put his hands around
my neck when angry, or pull out my hair
when he didn’t like what I’d said
how in the morning I’d sweep my hair from the floor
and search for concealer and scarves to hide the red marks
It was the first time I’d said a word to anyone
A relief in sharing the secrets of my face
She said with kindness and compassion
Don’t you think you deserve better?
It was my first step out of the web
The first time I could see.
After years and years of grey
The colours came back to me
